What To Do When You Are Feeling Down
Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a fellow turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out.
Do you believe that your life should be smooth sailing all day, every day?
If you say "Yes," you spend a lot of time being disappointed and frustrated.
If you say "No," then chances are that you are better at dealing with life's unexpected hiccups.
And if you let life's twists and turns throw you for a loop, it will cause you to give up when you should be sticking it out.
It took me a long time to learn this. I had to learn a new way of thinking. I had to learn to lower my standards.
Many of us have hidden expectations. I call them hidden because we are often unaware that those expectations even exist. But they do exist. And they drive some of our behaviors, choices, and attitudes.
Here is how things usually go. Your day is going really good. You feel wonderful and your outlook is positive. Then, IT happens. Something comes from nowhere and hits you on the blind side. You can't believe this is happening. Your mood suddenly sinks followed anger and frustration. "Why is this happening?"
When you ask that question - Why is this happening? - it triggers you to look for someone or something to blame. And this is where we lose our focus and sidetrack ourselves onto a dead end road.
Let's face it. Life is NOT a smooth road. Life is more like a roller coaster. You can just go ahead and expect the ups and downs.
When you lower your expectation that everything in your life will go "just right," it changes your outlook to one that will allow you to accept the downs.
And the main thing that you need to remember is this: after every "down" there is an "up" just around the corner.
Here are some strategies that you can use to help you hold on when things get crazy:
"This too shall pass." In the words of Seal, "Time keeps on ticking into the future. Time flies don't it, baby?" In the church they put it like this, "Trouble don't last always!". Know that whatever you are going through now will change if you persist. Yes, this too shall pass.
Remember that you are human. Everyone is entitled to a "bad" day - rich, poor, young, and old." It is part of being human. We are subject to mistakes and failings. Give yourself a Grace Card. Forgive yourself. Do NOT dwell on what went wrong. Forgive yourself, learn from it, and move on.
Love on yourself. Instead of worrying about things that you cannot change, take a break and do something loving yourself or someone important to you. There is nothing like filling your tank or someone else's tank; it helps take the focus away from the problem or challenge facing you.
Repeat your affirmations, mantra, or favorite Scripture. Using affirmations to encourage yourself is a solid strategy for turning your mood from sour to peaceful. The key here is not waiting until the storm comes to prepare for it. I teach some positive strategies as part of my Journey to Freedom course.
Use your Vision or Dream Board. Reminding yourself of what is important (and what is NOT) helps you let go of small situations. Let's face it, many times we turn molehills into mountains by imagining the absolutely worst possible scenario. Focusing on manifesting the positive outcomes you want to see in your life takes you out of the negative zone and puts you into the control seat. Need to understand how to put a Vision Board together? Sign up for my class where I will teach you how to create and effectively use Vision Boards.
You don't have to let life's downs get the best of you. Make up in your mind that you will outlast your circumstances and things will get better. Making that simple shift will help you hang on when times are tough.
And as always, I am right here cheering for you!