The Liability of Being Yourself
Everyone is talking about the value of loving yourself. I started this blog with the message "learn how to love Your Unique so you can live Your Unique." And I love celebrating individuality of thought, personality, and expression.
But few people talk about the downsides of being Unique. There is absolutely a cost to coming out of the shadows and standing in your authenticity.
Dr. Brene Brown describes it as a "hustle for worthiness." In this hustle, we throw away parts of ourselves so others will find us more acceptable and lovable.
That hustle will cost us. We eventually become lost to who we really are. We wake up confused and miserable yet we are not exactly sure why or how we became that way. This is the tragedy of this kind of hustle.
But the flip side of that same coin is the cost we face when we become true to who we really are. We face rejection and a consistent stream of feedback from the people who are still hustling.
These people mean well. They really want us to fit in with everybody else. They make comments about our Unique and give us "advice" and what we need to do to become "normal."
I am here to tell you that "normal" is overrated. And that the kind of hustle that leads to you becoming less of yourself is the most costly.
I have experienced both sides of this coin. For many years, I hustled for love, acceptance, and belonging. I wanted people to like me, to accept me, and to make me feel better about being me.
And that hustle left me miserable, sad, and feeling ALONE.
I started a journey to understanding ME. And I discovered something interesting.
The rejection that I felt most was not from other people. I was having a hard time with love and acceptance because I had failed to love and accept myself. Other people's rejection of me was a manifestation of the script playing in my own head.
Do you see that? The script playing in your own head is at the root of this hustle.
So I set out on a journey to change that script. And what I learned is that coming out of the shadows will cost you. But it will also FREE you.
Yes, you will still face rejection. But because you have learned to love and accept yourself, the sting of that rejection fades away.
Today, I know who I am. And most importantly, I know and understand who I am NOT.
The real liability is NOT other people's rejection of you. The real liability is your failure to accept and love yourself. And if you can ditch that mental trap, your life will suddenly open to the love and acceptance you searched for all of those years.
I am your friend. Your are NOT alone.
And I am cheering for you!
P.S. My FREE online course can help you get started on your journey to understanding YOU. And in the process, you will create an unique strategy and personal action plan for success. Join me by CLICKING HERE.